Have you ever been to one of those baby showers where they play the purse game? You know, the one where they have a list of items and you retrieve them from your purse if you have it, and the one who has the most WINS? I LOVE that game...... I ALWAYS win!!!
My purse weighs about 30 pounds. My mom thinks that is why I have a bad shoulder, but silly her, I don't even carry it on that side. Besides I like to think of it as load bearing exercise!
At this given moment I can find these things in my purse.
- a paintbrush, band-aids, and string.
- a sucker (with wrapper intact) that I keep for my grandson. He always knows he can find a sucker in my purse.
- A heart shaped rock (I found this on my path and knew my grandson would delight in it.)
- big red gum. It's so hard to find gum with real sugar in it these days.
- a pen.......okay 4
- a screwdriver. I always need on of these for opening paint cans, scraping something, and the handle works as a hammer in a pinch.
- a few random screw bits, and a flashlight.
- a half eaten doughnut, and yes it's in a ziplock, and a half dozen m&m's roaming freely at the bottom of my purse collecting lint.
- I have ibuprofen and one vitamin (you never know when the mood will strike to get healthy.)
- I have an eyeglass case that I never put my glasses in. If I did I would never be able to find them. Instead they hold packets of eyeglass wipes because I throw my glasses in my purse and have to dig around to retrieve them.
- a candy bar and a half eaten roll of sweetarts.
- some lipstick, although I can't ever remember using it but my mom says lipstick is a necessity.
- my wallet and $6.37 in miscellaneous quarters, dimes, nickels and pennies. No wonder my purse is so heavy!!!
The contents of my purse may change from time to time, but the bizarre collection of items remains a constant. My children tease me about being able to survive for weeks if dropped in the desert. Secretly they love this about me.
During intermission at the theater the kids will fight to sit next me. It's not about me, it's about my purse! "hey mom, can I have a sandwich from your purse? I forgot to eat dinner." Or an exaggerated trip to the DMV and it's, "I need to eat my feelings, hand me a chocolate bar!"
But alas, I have yet to master Great Grandma's trick. After 2 hours at the zoo in Phoenix, Arizona and 100 degree weather, she would ask, "Who wants a Popsicle?" And out of her magical purse she would pull out completely pristine, glistening, frozen solid Popsicles. Now that is something to aspire to!!
To all the other moms out there, prepared to head into battle with your 30 pound purse, I salute you!